Killer Blames Booze

"I've been sitting up here for an hour and nobody's offered me anything but a lousy glass of water. Is this Vegas or what. Tell y'what - the first person to bring me a G and T is officially in the band. That's how these two got in -"

The Killers frontman Brandon Flowers has heaped praise on his wife for helping him give up alcohol. The rocker - who married schoolteacher Tana Munblowsky in 2005 - credits his spouse for helping him give up the booze-fuelled rock lifestyle.

He says, "Do I miss alcohol? Oh, absolutely! I mean I'll admit I'm still slightly fond of it, it's delicious - really the nectar of the gods. The moment it hits my tongue I'm transformed from a mousefart to a sex god, a talentless dweeb to the most brilliant artist of our time. It's not all that expensive and you can get it practically anywhere, I mean I can drink beer even if it's luke warm, I'd lick it off the floor of the monkey house at the zoo. Even the cheapest rot-gut bargain basement wine tastes like Ambrosia and just a hint of it on my tongue transports me to a world where horny naked women roam in packs and I'm the only man who didn't have his weiner chopped off in the great penis-purge of the all-powerful Pentaverate.

"My wife won't miss it. She's glad I'm no longer drinking, glad that I don't spray paint the furniture at 3 o clock in the morning. Or bring home prostitutes to add to my collection in the basement (after all she's the one who gets stuck with feeding them and cleaning out their cage.) I'll miss the leaches and the rack and the pendulum. I mean just the look on a critic's face right before they're lowered into the Pirhana pool. Just to hear the amazing change in their opinion the desperate promises to print retracions . . . well it's heart warming. When I think that none of these joys would be be possible without the aid of the booze - I have to admit that I'll miss it. but marriage requires sacrifice."