Spears Chuckles

"I hate that Mickey Mouse lawyer, what a dork."

About an hour after her October 11th appearance in court marked by her immature outbursts at the judge, Britney Spears took a trip to Neiman Marcus and kept the party going. Us Weekly reports:

First the pop star commandeered a dressing room (generally reserved for the disabled) to try on a slew of Juicy Couture dresses. Then, after belting out Rihanna's "Umbrella," Spears told her assistant Bret she wanted her dog London. Learning the Yorkie was in Malibu, 27 miles away, she said, "Fuck that." That will take us an hour to drive there. How about my babies? Where they at? Y'know what - screw it, I'm having fun. Then Spears -- within earshot of an Us reporter and other shoppers -- reserved her finest words for the judge in her custody battle with KFed, L.A. County commissioner Scott M. Gordon, whose court she had just left after a 45-minute screaming contest. "I hate my judge," Spears declared to Bret. "He is so mean. Just an old fart. He told me I was being catty with him, but he was being catty with me and paid me no respect at all."

Britney's right. That judge paid her no respect at all. He's just a judge and stuff, she's a superstar babe with hundreds of adoring fans worldwide. They should have carried Britney into the courtroom on a gold, bejeweled throne while handmaidens fanned her with palm branches and five African women danced around and threw rose petals in the air. Then an old man in a long flowing robe and sandals would read from a scroll, extolling the virtues of Miss Britney's majestic power and wisdom. The judge would've been so ashamed he tried to challenge Britney that he would beaten himself over the head with his gavel then banished himself to an island, never to be heard from again. He should be so lucky.