Film-maker Tarsem Singh is a visual stylist to be sure. Watching one of his films is sort of like watching one of your favorite paintings come to life. Its too bad that his latest film is only tolerable when characters aren't talking. As the trailer suggests, Immortals plays like a combination of Clash of the Titans and 300 and while its certainly better than then the former, it isn't half as exciting as that latter. As Immortals begins, we're introduced to peasant Theseus (played by Henry Cavill--soon to be seen as Superman). Upon defending the honor of his mother, Theseus engages in battle with Hyperian (a creepy Mickey Rourke)--a barbaric, enraged king who has a beef with all humanity. Their feud stirs up controversy amongst the Gods and before long, an entirely new war is waged. There is much visual splendor to be found in Immortals but that beauty is undercut by a story and characters that feel far less than authentic. Cavill is decent in the lead, but he's hardly able to carry the weight of the film on his shoulders (hopefully, he'll fair better as the Man of Steel) and when supporting players like a painfully miscast Stephen Dorf (an actor whom I often quite enjoy) show up, any effectiveness the film might have had to offer is rendered moot. As expected, Immortals is violent and the hokey CG blood splatter sprays from the screen in pointless 3D. If only the violence offered up a visceral charge. This film is just never engaging in any way. Even Tarsem's spiritual undercurrent feels labored and silly. Its ironic that Singh's first foray into big studio film-making emerges as his least interesting work (for the record, check out his strongest film--the underappreciated The Fall), and with the relentless cheesiness at the center of the trailer for his upcoming Snow White adaptation Mirror Mirror, I fear that this visual stylist may have lost his way. I really hope I'm wrong, because Singh has great potential. Potential that's ultimately squandered by the epic bore that is Immortals.

Grade: C