Even though the original Urban Legends was a huge heap of steaming elephant dung, I had my hopes up that the sequel wouldn't smell quite as bad. After all, it's the directorial debut of John Ottman, the editor and music composer of The Usual Suspects. This is a man who's obviously got a keen eye for plot structure. Alas, Urban Legends is another one of those stupid post modern horror films that thinks it's hip when it's actually just stupid.

Urban Legends' big gimmick is that it takes place at a film school--leaving it's story open to the usual, obligatory movie references, resembling Wes Craven's Scream 3 and countless other rehashed horror films. The plot is certainly original--a killer with a mask begins picking off the cast members one by one.

The backdrop involves a young female film student who is directing a film on urban legends--hence the premise behind the title. Urban Legends is a overly calculated mess that never manages to scare or engage the audience, although it does offer one inspiring moment near the end that tips it's hat to the original Urban Legend. The identity of the killer is nothing special and a buddy of mine had it pegged in the first reel. I was so bored while I watched this film that I was trying to rewrite the damn thing in my mind as it moved along.

Ottman does have an interesting directing style, but it never amounts to anything because of a screenplay that's just beyond salvage. Some of the make-up effects are quite good, but again, they're just a tool. Without a decent story you have nothing.

Urban Legends is an obvious homage to the films of Hitchcock as well as the post modern horror movie but a laughable one. Rather than being rehash, why couldn't the film-makers try something interesting or intelligent like Anthony Waller's brilliant Mute Witness (another film Urban Legends seems to be ripping off). There are still good horror films to be made. Look at The Blair Witch Project. I know many people disliked it, but it did prove that there are still novel directions to take the genre. NOTE TO HOLLYWOOD: PLEASE STOP REMAKING THE SAME DAMN MOVIE! TRY SOMETHING NEW FOR A CHANGE!

Let's hope that Urban Legends: The Final Cut is the final chapter in this dreadfully repetitive genre, because it makes Scary Movie look like Citizen Kane.