God, are these guys some sort of a bad joke? After listening to this New York five piece's debut album, that's the conclusion I've come up with. It's got to be, right? These guys can't possibly be for real, could they? Maybe Brandon Flowers of The Killers was correct in his assumptions that The Bravery are a sham of a band meant to cash in on The Killers success. When I first read those allegations, I thought, damn Brandon! We all had you pegged for something of a Diva - but tone it down a notch, dude - we want to like you! I guess you're the only one allowed to start a band that pays tribute to your synth-pop heroes, huh? But now…I… I just don't know. That statement makes a whole lot of sense.

What label are The Killers on? Island. What label are The Bravery on? Island. Hmmmmm. Coincidence? Looks like maybe Island is putting some bands together to make a little green - don't you think? I mean, think about it. When Rage Against The Machine started that whole rap-metal thing, look at how many awful copycats it spawned. Shit, you think Taproot and (hed) pe have an original bone in their body? Hell no! Someone (a label, manager, talent-scout) flashed some cash in front of their face and they asked where do we sign up? That's what happens when a certain style of music turns into a big cash cow and you're kidding yourself if you think otherwise.

I don't know, maybe I'm wrong about The Bravery being a factory built band. But I do know one thing: these guys suck like A Flock Of Seagulls sucked back in the 80's. The Bravery are nothing more than a singing hairdo. This is a synth-band tailor-made for the Good Charlotte community; all mascara, trucker hats, droopy jeans and no substance.

Who the hell is Sam Endicott anyway? I know he's the lead singer of The Bravery, but who the hell did he have to felate at Island to be allowed to produce his own debut record? Well whomever it was I hope it was worth it, because this album sounds like it was produced by a fourth generation clone. Completely flat and lifeless, (just like his voice) this album sounds like it really is trying to be nothing more than a copycat Killers. Oh, except for "Public Service Announcement," the track where they decided to rip off The Strokes; they are from New York after all. And the lyrics to "P.S.A.?" "I'm stingy with words, all binge no purge. You put the broke in broken hearted. You put the art in retarded." There is no word to describe this kind of brilliance so I'm going to make one up…scrumtrilecent!

With all the positive buzz these guys are getting from Rolling Stone to NME I'm sure I'll be receiving quite the negative feedback shitstorm (because big publications like that are never wrong) but I don't care. When nobody gives a rat's ass about these guys in 10 years, just remember that I told you all from the beginning what a pile of horse dung The Bravery are.